2 key steps that kick-started my journey with self-love and self-worth
Can you look at the story you’ve been telling yourself surrounding your worthiness with compassion?
There’s no need to be judging ourselves for it. We had our reasons to hold on to that story.
There was a pay-off.
Can you lean into how much you’re hurting yourself? And really allow yourself to feel it all?
Can you hold a safe space for yourself and explore how you’re holding yourself back?
Let me share a bit about my journey with limiting beliefs around self-love and self-worth .
I started to really dive into this after becoming a mom.
My need for external validation and confirmation of my worthiness and lovability had me anxiety ridden, and in a constant fight or flight mode.
Actually, let me rephrase that… it wasn’t just a ‘need’. It felt like it was a sincere threat to my being if I didn’t find proof of it.
And my stories surrounding my worth (my internal world) completely skewed how I viewed my external world.
Combine that with not being able to give MYSELF the validation and love that I was hunting for…and you have a recipe for anxiety and depression.
I was so physically and mentally tired of being a slave to my emotions, that I started to dive deep with compassion.
I became in touch with my darkest and deepest thoughts and things started to shift.
I sincerely fell in LOVE with this process of self-exploration.
It’s an ongoing process and a practice. Because that illusive quest for worthiness can come up in so many area’s of life.
Yes, it brings up shtuff. Yes, it makes me FEEL things. But that’s where the gold is!
Because NOT wanting to feel things…by numbing and not wanting to face my inner-demons…THAT is what kept me stuck. That is what sabotaged my ability to truly feel emotions on the whole spectrum (i.e. joy and love).
I’ve learned that there are 2 Key components to self-discovery:
1) Own your story.
Come at it with an angle of compassion and a sincere desire to get to know and understand yourself better.
Compassion is the key-ingredient here. If you know you’re going to meet yourself with criticism and judgment…you won’t set yourself up to go layers deep.
Be prepared to feel. All of it. It’s where the magic happens.
2) Re-visit if your story is serving you right now.
Is there a discrepancy between how you currently feel and how you’d like to feel?
Are you acting and thinking in alignment with your values? Do you know what those are?
Evaluate if your story is adding up to how you want to feel in your daily life; in your relationships.; in the choices you make. What do you need to tweak (or perhaps completely alter) in your story and in your actions in order to get there?
Enjoy getting to know yourself better. You’ll put yourself back into the driver seat. ❤️