The difference between self-improvement and chasing worthiness.


There is such a downfall to the whole self-improvement and self-help industry (including the fitness industry I’m in!)

Articles and workshops that try to make us believe that we need to attend/read/subscribe in order to unlock our fullest potential, how to be more successful, have your best body ever…etc.

It tries to make us believe and feel that without reading this book, attending this workshop, following a certain program for 30 days…we won’t be good enough. It reinforces that we are lacking something.

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE reading inspirational quotes, blogs, and books.

I’ve read quite my share of self-help books.

And still seek out books about i.e. leadership, motivation, psychology etc.

But I used to read them with the underlying thought: “once I’m done reading this... x, y, z will be solved.”

It came with an underlying feeling of chasing my worthiness.

Of not being capable, worthy, loveable…yet.

Ha! I remember that (pre-kids) I was trying to quit smoking (after so many failed attempts) and I didn’t want to finish reading the book by Allan Carr, because I was worried that I actually would quit then! (Can you tell I wasn't ready?!)

I did eventually quit. But not right after I read the last page.

It wasn’t until I became pregnant with my first born (which provided me with the biggest motivation ever) and remembered one little part of that book that talked about “killing the nicotine monster” and being tired of being a slave to it.

Whenever I would have a craving in the first couple of weeks, I would remind myself that I was killing it.

If I would feed it again, I would keep it alive and stay in the ban of the cigarette.

I see those books and programs in a different way now. I realize that they can be amazing for planting seeds.

But you need to be willing and open and ready(!) to put in the work.

Just attending the program or reading the content is not going to do anything if you’re not willing to be honest about your current ways of being and believing.

It’s not going to do anything if you’re not ready to make a change, with the main reason being because you want the best for yourself.

Because you’re tired of feeling a certain way.

Not because you’re not worthy or loveable if you don’t.

How do you want to feel and what can you do to instil sparks that support feeling that way?

That help you behave and think in ways that add up to living a life the way you want your life to feel.

Be clear on your values. Be clear on your motives.

Let it come from a place of self-love.

YOU have the answers. YOU are in charge. YOU are worthy and good enough right now. Already. <3

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Mireille Nalder - AFLCA, Fit4Two Certified Motivator - (403) 869 2563 - info@liveitfitnesscalgary.com